notokinthehead











{July 30, 2013}   Let’s Go Crazy

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{July 30, 2013}   Thank You

Thank You

Being an EMT/firefighter myself I know that we don’t hear this nearly enough. Most people have no idea about the things we see and the challenges we face. But we do it because there’s nothing else we would rather do. Thankless job or not, we eat, sleep and breathe to help people.

 



{July 30, 2013}   ~*New Beginnings*~ (Revised)
Summer Storm

A photo I captured immediately after a violent storm tore through.



{July 26, 2013}   I Work for a Higher Power

And I don’t mean someone with a fancy job title who makes more money than I do.

Here’s how my day has gone, so far:
04:00am- small fire in a machine shop. Piece of cake.

04:40am- 62 year old male, heart attack. With some Aspirin and some Nitroglycerin we were able to stop it, temporarily, and get him to the hospital.

10:30am- 84 year old female with severe stomach pain and possibly bloody stools. Package and transport.

13:00pm- 76 year old male fell, definite broken hip/pelvis. We gave him pain meds before we moved him and transported him.

18:00pm- requested by State Police to respond and check on a 43 year old male who had been assaulted. Upon arrival we fund out that his 20 year old son used his face for a punching bag, and he was positive he didn’t have any facial fractures because he’d fractured almost every bone in his face when he was younger and a “brawler”. We did not transport him. Good thing because any technician sitting in the back of the ambulance with him would have gotten drunk off his breath.

Five calls in one day is a lot for my department. Sometimes we can go a week without a single call. I’m a volunteer firefighter/EMT. That’s why I say I work for a Higher Power. I do it because it’s a calling to help people, not for the puny paycheck. Even if I didn’t get paid a penny for going on these calls I would still do it. I’ve never done anything more rewarding than holding an elderly patients hand while he writhed in pain, or holding a Mother while she cries because her daughter just completed suicide. You can’t put an hourly rate on this job. It has to be in your heart. And you have to have a strong heart to do the job without becoming damaged yourself.



{July 25, 2013}   Goodbye Life Preserver

Quick replay of the last two weeks: my seventeen year old nephew moved in and my whole world shook. I gave up half of my floor so the kid would have a place to sleep. He was basically kidnapped from us when he was three and I was seven years old. His father (no relation to me) did hard time for raping a three year old girl (not nearly enough time, if you ask me). Suddenly the State places him in my home two weeks ago. We really don’t know anything about this kid except he watches Spongebob 16 hours a day and sleeps the rest.

Fast-forward to the present: I’m sitting in my car at a Dunkin’ Donuts a few towns over from my house. Why? Because my niece is in my bed. My parents don’t trust my nephew with my seven year old niece because of what his father did and so they won’t put her in a room that isn’t locked up like Fort Knox.

I’m sitting here at Dunkin’ Donuts sipping my coffee and thinking about it all. I’m usually not a selfish person. However, I feel like the line has been crossed. My one safe, quiet place has been taken away. I should probably mention that my niece does not have to stay at my house, but my Mother likes to have her sleep over a few nights a week. So why isn’t she in my Mother’s bed???

Some nights when I’m undressing for bed I feel like I should check my clothes for dirty shoe prints because it sure feels like I’m being trampled on an awful lot.



{July 24, 2013}   ~*Time Slipping Away*~

Time Slipping Away



{July 19, 2013}   ~*New Beginnings*~

The sky blackens with threatening clouds
the breeze becomes a violent wind
the hair on my arms stand up
my pulse quickened.

I watch the lightning strike
feel th thunder rattle my bones
I close my eyes to the flashes
feel the cool rain on my skin.

The sun peaks through cracks in the clouds
thunder fades and birds are singing
tiny beads of water coat the foliage
the summer storm has passed…
… leaving life in it’s path.



{July 18, 2013}   Lightning Strikes Again

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I’m scared to death of thunder and lightning. And my fears are legit: we fought a structure fire last night that was caused by lightning. Today we got called back for hot spots. I got nasty sweaty and dirty. And it’s 92° out with 94% humidity. Ugh!
We’re supposed to have more severe thunderstorms rolling in within the next two hours. Fingers crossed that it doesn’t start any fires or cause anyone else the heartache of losing their home.
I haven’t taken any pain killers in two days and man am I feeling it. Especially after the structure fires.



{July 16, 2013}   Truth

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{July 16, 2013}   Drug Addict’s Candy Store

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I imagine that from the outside looking in I appear to be a sort of candy store for drug addicts.
Yesterday I went against myself on my stand against taking narcotics. The pain in my shoulder was so excruciating it woke me up around 05:30 and I actually cried from it. So I called my doctor and she gave me some Vicodyn. I’ve been taking, too. It’s finally gotten to the point where I’m in too much pain to go on emergency calls anyway, so I may as well take the pain killers, right? I don’t like the way the Vicodyn makes my head feel though. I’m still trying to decide if the minimal amount of pain relief that it provides is worth feeling drugged. I’m such a light weight. I didn’t sleep well at all last night, I tossed and turned, cried a little from frustration and pain and finally fell into a restless sleep sometime just before 05:00 this morning.
98°F Outside, 94°F in my room right now. Between the heat and humidity and the Vicodyn I’ll probably be passed out soon. On the bright side of things my ice pack is multifunctional today 🙂



et cetera