notokinthehead











{January 8, 2014}   Simply Love

There’s a fierceness
In her eyes.
It scares me,
Intimidates me, ultimately
It makes me
High.

There’s a fire
In her touch.
It burns me,
Hurts me, like
An arsonist I
Can’t get enough.

She pushes me down,
Then lifts me up.
She pushes me around,
All in the name of love.
I want to walk away,
She pulls me right back.
I convince myself no more, no way,
But I’ve found myself on a one-way track.

There’s a tenderness
In her embrace.
It warms me,
Comforts me, our
Love is hereby
God’s Dear Grace.



{October 20, 2013}   Drained

How can one

person take so

much from you?

Out of you?

How can one

person cause you

so much pain?

So much frustration?

 

Seems it’s true-

you’re damned if

you don’t, damned

if you do.

Do you crawl

into your own

dark abyss, lock

yourself away from

the people, the

mess? Isolate and

keep your heart

safe?

 

I’ve been hurt by who I thought was a good friend, and in turn the person I thought was a good friend turned to my own family to try and turn them against me with their lies. Fortunately for me my family knows me and knows that person is lying about me. However it doesn’t stop it from stinging. I too easily turn the hurt and pain into anger. I’m battling the anger now, though it feels like a losing fight. I’m finding myself feeling vindictive, and that scares me because I’m not a vindictive person. Tomorrow morning I have a meeting with the Chief of Police in hopes of getting the harassing text messages and phone calls to stop. I need to dig down deep right now and find the strength to be the bigger person. I can overcome the little people in this world. I just have to stay strong and not let them win.



{October 6, 2013}   Expanding my Musical Horizons

Thanks to a new friend I recently discovered a liking for Fiona Apple. Here are a few songs I really enjoyed and want to share:

My FAVORITE so far is “Get Gone”:



{September 3, 2013}   ~*Take My Time*~

Take My Time



{August 29, 2013}   Addictions

Addictions



{August 22, 2013}   ~*What A Girl Wants*~

She Is Me



{August 18, 2013}   ~*High*~

I’ve been strong for far too long,
I just can’t keep the pace.
I’ve been carrying on,
driving down the same old roads,
I’m losing faith, starting to lose face.
Seems it’s the same from day-to-day,
It seems nothing ever changes.
I’ve nothing left to lose,
there’s nothing left to gain,
I’m all out of things to say.
These pills only kill the pain for just so long,
just one more line, I think-
and I’ll be able to go on.
I’ve run out of cigarettes
and I’m down to my last shot of whiskey,
I know that if I keep this up
this lifestyle will kill me.
I need a helping hand,
someone to save me from myself
because I don’t think I can,
and I don’t know how much more I can stand.
I feel I’ve lost my mind- all concept of time-
and I’m going to extremes just to unwind.
So hold me close and don’t let me go,
I’m becoming my own worst enemy.
Hold me tight and don’t let my mind take flight,
I feel it’s getting harder for me to breathe.
I’m sorry if my words have brought you down,
it seems like you’re always around
for the good and the bad days,
when I’m feeling crazy, a touch insane.
You get it all,
the best of me and the worst of me,
now that I’m down on my knees, crying ‚Äúplease”
I hear you whispering to me calmly,
soothing away my misery.
I realize you make me want to be a better person,
and I know that through trials and tribulations
your love and patience can replace my addictions.



{August 11, 2013}   ~*Love’s End*~
Another poem I just penned.

Another poem I just penned.



{August 6, 2013}   ~*Love Letter*~

Love Letter



{July 30, 2013}   ~*New Beginnings*~ (Revised)
Summer Storm

A photo I captured immediately after a violent storm tore through.



et cetera