notokinthehead











{October 20, 2013}   Drained

How can one

person take so

much from you?

Out of you?

How can one

person cause you

so much pain?

So much frustration?

 

Seems it’s true-

you’re damned if

you don’t, damned

if you do.

Do you crawl

into your own

dark abyss, lock

yourself away from

the people, the

mess? Isolate and

keep your heart

safe?

 

I’ve been hurt by who I thought was a good friend, and in turn the person I thought was a good friend turned to my own family to try and turn them against me with their lies. Fortunately for me my family knows me and knows that person is lying about me. However it doesn’t stop it from stinging. I too easily turn the hurt and pain into anger. I’m battling the anger now, though it feels like a losing fight. I’m finding myself feeling vindictive, and that scares me because I’m not a vindictive person. Tomorrow morning I have a meeting with the Chief of Police in hopes of getting the harassing text messages and phone calls to stop. I need to dig down deep right now and find the strength to be the bigger person. I can overcome the little people in this world. I just have to stay strong and not let them win.



{March 21, 2012}   *~Broken Promises~*

Photo I took of the sunset in Florida.

It wasn’t supposed to be like this
We made each other a promise
Sit down and unclench your fists
We keep going around and around
Until we knock each other down
Yelling names rolling on the ground
Yeah, drink some more alcohol
Am I more tolerable now?
Are you ready to hear me out?
I have a lot of things bottled up inside
You’re going to listen if it takes all night
Why is it so hard for you to look me in the eyes?
Every time you open your mouth it’s lies
Don’t you think I deserve some truth?
When did it become either me or you?
Don’t you appreciate anything I do?
We used to be so good together
Now I can’t wait for all this to be over
You think life without me is better?
I can’t imagine my life without you
I don’t believe you when you say we’re through
We’re both tiring of this dance we do
Neither of us can let go of our pride
Would you feel better if I cried?
Things will look better in the morning light
It’s just another stupid fight
So rest your head and close your eyes
And while you sleep I’ll hold you tight.



et cetera